My Family After Tragedy

  During the past few months, I’ve been writing stories about my family—about the things we’ve done together, and about what it feels like to live without Christina here physically. As I reflect on these memories and emotions, one thing keeps surfacing: life is full of randomness. There is no master plan. We all carry goals and dreams—things we hope to accomplish. To reach them, we map out paths in our minds; some of us even write them down as steps or priorities. Those paths help us stay focused. But in my experience, execution never happens in a vacuum. It unfolds in the shifting currents of everyday life, shaped—and sometimes redirected—by circumstances beyond our control. Christina and I had many plans. One recurring dream was to take a long holiday together, just the two of us. We imagined ourselves somewhere warm, stretched out on a white sand beach, letting the sun warm our bodies. Sorry, girls—this dream was just for Mom and me. No kids. That’s how personal and intimate it...

We hadn't baked bread at home in a long time. The kind we usually make is a heavy, multigrain loaf, perfect for a satisfying breakfast. It's not fluffy, but it's the kind of bread that leaves you feeling full and happy any time of day. A slice of this toast is wonderful with butter and honey, and even better with a couple of fried eggs on top. It might not sound appetizing to everyone, but I love it. Sometimes I'll add a slice of whatever cheese and salami I can find. Livia enjoys that savory toast too, but Raquel doesn't care for it; she's a waffle girl through and through. The recipe we've always used for this heavy-grain bread calls for honey, but there's a note from Christina next to that line: "Use sugar instead." Her bread was always wonderful. The aroma of the bread now fills the house as it bakes, and I'm waiting for the timer to go off so I can take it out and let it cool overnight. I'm really looking forward to a slice. Over t...