My Family After Tragedy

When I tell my daughters that their mother was amazing, I am not sure they grasp the magnitude of her stature. They tell me – “Yes dad, we know”. I remember the day I saw Christina the first time. It was in the halls of the chemistry department of Simon Fraser University. We both entered this long hallway at the same time, in opposite directions, in white lab coats, and we had the opportunity to take a good look at each other. When we passed our eyes crossed. She kept walking without turning but I looked back to see her disappear into one of the laboratories. “ Wow, I do not have a remote chance with that girl! ” Years later, after we reunited in Vancouver, she told me that she thought the same "- He is going to make a woman very happy one day"  - She told me that she had no idea that it was going to be her. After I received the ultimatum letter from Canada Immigration, I was left with no option but to escape to the United States and avoid deportation and possible impriso...

  In one of the photos of our wedding day I was crying, and I started to cry since we were declared husband and wife. In that picture I am holding my wife’s flowers, she gave them to me to help me settle down. It worked, and a few minutes later I was calm and happy again. On the way to the hotel, where we were going to have our wedding dinner Christina was driving and I said, “We are married!!!”, and started to cry again, this time inconsolably encouraged by the fact that we were alone in the car. I could not stop!  Again, Christina gave me a map of Seattle and told me “here, help us get there!”. Why was I crying so hard? Yes, I was very happy but there was more, and it will all make sense if you keep reading. 1993 was a difficult year for me and my relationship with Christina. Sincerely, I thought that we could not survive that year. In 1992 I decided not to return to Cuba, for my own reasons and applied for refugee status under the Geneva Convention in Canada. Because I was ...

To honor Christina's memory, I am trying to solve problems a bit more like her. Already canceled her mobile number, and taking care of vehicles, went to the bank, legal photocopies of important documents, government applications forms almost ready to be sent. There is so much to do when a tragedy like this one hits a family and the worst is that I had to face all of these things alone. If I would do things like "me", my way, the wrong way... (the Cuban way?), then I would have said - "I am tired now, and all these will be done, perhaps, later" - I would have started in August! There we are, December of 1994, and believe me, it was not enough time together. In those days I was living in New York and we got married in Seattle, Washington. We did it that way to allow her family to attend our ceremony.  I wanted us to get married in New York where my science career was finally taking off. To give you some context; I was working at the City University Of New York...

On the evening of May 12th, just after we finished dinner, Christina settled into her favorite reclining chair. This was her sanctuary—a place where she would meditate for hours, sometimes drifting off to sleep. I'd often go to her, gently caress her forehead, and she would respond with a quiet smile, her eyes fluttering open. But on this night, there was no response. She seemed to be in a very deep sleep. "Rest, Christina," I thought, and I went back to the kitchen to do the dishes. The quiet was broken by our older daughter, Livia. "Dad, Mom's nose is bleeding." "It's a side effect," I said, my hands still wet from the sink. "The Avastin can do that." Livia's voice was filled with worry. "What if it's not? Should we call 911?" I wanted to avoid the emergency room and the risk of COVID, so I decided to call the on-call oncologist first. "Let's see what the doctor says," I told her. "You can go ahe...